DEAR JERKASS: My sister, who is very religious, sent my gay daughter a Bible with her name engraved on it for Christmas, even though we told her -- after she asked for suggestions -- that a gift card would be more appropriate. We are not religious, by the way.
My wife and I feel strange about it, as if my sister is trying to tell us something like, "Your gay daughter needs religion." How should we respond to this? -- BAFFLED IN THE EAST DEAR CONFUSED IN BABYLON: Gays can't believe in Jesus? Was it a gift to you, or your fucking daughter? Be thankful your daughter wasn't four and got a toy drum set for her birthday. I know, we're all afraid that our kids are going to fall under some psycho spell and become monsters. My kid looks like he's turning out to be a vegetarian, and it keeps me up at night. Let him become a gay porn star, but please God! Don't let him be a vegetarian, or I'll never hear the end of it. "I'm a vegetarian. I'm a vegetarian. Did I tell you I'm a vegetarian?" Ugh. Sick. So back to the topic: are you afraid that you didn't raise your daughter well enough to make choices for herself so you need to give her safe spaces when confronted with ideas or beliefs she doesn't like? Have you taught her that you can disagree with someone and still love them? Or are you the "Love Trumps hate and I'll show you how much I love you by hitting you in the face for disagreeing with me" camp? You're not religious....so no one else can be religious in your house? If you're so worried then get your daughter the Queen James Bible (link in the Custom Pick). I suggest instead of writing a columnist for advice you talk to your daughter about how SHE feels, and have her talk to her aunt about it. Otherwise, it's not really your problem. Unless you did create a sheltered safe spacer, and then it is all your fault and you are a terrible parent.
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