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The Special Olympics of Internet Arguments

10/22/2012

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I admit, I get sucked into internet arguments. I read comments of Yahoo! news and if the comment is particularly redundant or inane I feel this overwhelming compulsion to throw my two bits in.

I am a very opinionated person, and I have a tendency to look down on others who don't agree with me. This is at odds with how I also give people the benefit of the doubt, or accept that there is more than one way to do things.

Here's a safe topic we can all get irritated about: Star Wars. I can't stand Star Wars. To me it is a soap opera, and the only thing missing from it is an evil twin (although Luke does have a paternal twin sister. Did I use that right? I always mix up paternal with fraternal).

Star Wars has the worst character arcs, giant Death Star plot-holes, retconning and cliche dialogue I have ever seen. I didn't even like it when I was a child.

Now I have watched both trilogies, played the games, read one or two of the books, watched the behind the scenes movies, read Joseph Campbells “Hero With A Thousand Faces”, seen the old Flash Gordon serials, so it isn't as though I am not completely in the dark about what goes on in these movies.

Chewbacca is from Endor, right?




(Pause)




Even with all this information I still just plain don't like the movies. I don't like how Luke's family dies and the film makes it out like he's doing this great sacrifice by joining the rebellion. Everything he cared for was destroyed, so glad he could tear himself away.

I don't like how easy it is to destroy a Death Star, not to mention flying through a straight corridor and firing.

I don't like how Obi Wan tells Luke his father is dead, and then backtracks in the next movies. Like those pesky mitichlorians.

I don't like how the most intelligent and wise being in the universe can't use proper grammar. Break me a fucking give.

There are many more reasons why I don't care for the films. But you know what? I know people who LOVE them, and a thrilled every time they get a chance to see it, who share it with their children, and that's cool. Stupid, moronic, terrible decisions these parents have made. But let them do it.




Star Trek will still be available to kids, so everything is right with the universe.




Kashyyyk

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  • The Mind Cannibalism
  • Thought For Food
  • Who is Judas X. Machina?
  • Mental Sewage
  • Experimental
  • The basics of Finding Fault
    • Failed Daily
  • Dear Jerkass