DEAR JERKASS: I recently took my children to spend a week with my mother-in-law, "Bea." Three days after we arrived, my husband flew in to join us. The next day, Bea handed me a hotel room key and told me to take as many of the children as I wanted, but I could not take my husband because she never gets to spend time with him!
I told Bea I was offended, and that I should not have been invited if it wasn't a "family" trip. As I was packing to leave, my mother-in-law left and spent the rest of our visit in the hotel herself while my family and I stayed at her home.
My husband has now told me that I will not be "allowed" to visit her again, and when she visits us next, it will be just him and the kids because I make his mother "uncomfortable." Must I stay away as he says, or should I pursue keeping myself included when they visit my mother-in-law? -- MOM OF FOUR IN MARYLAND
What a see-you-next-Tuesday. Tell Queen Bea-otch from now on she can see her son and that's it. Cut her off from the kids. And tell your nitwit mother-loving husband to get his head out of his ass and cut the imbilical cord. What unmitigated bullshit.
Make sure she knows that she is not welcome in your home, and if your husband objects, then tell him making you leave was an apron-string decision and he better figure out who he's sleeping with at night! Fuckin momma's boys.
That bitch can take a flying leap off a tall building.
Normally I would advocate communication, but this kind of childish garbage implies that she wouldn't listen to you if you tried.
Judas' Advice Column
This is where I take a Dear Abby column, and add my own brand of advice. I started by calling it Dear Crabby, but that's taken and JERKASS seems more fun.