DEAR JERKASS: My 19-year-old sister died two years ago from an overdose. I'm 13. We were very close when we were little, but during the four years before she passed away, my parents didn't want us around each other for fear of her rubbing off on me, and she wasn't home half the time anyway. A year earlier she went to rehab, and I remember talking with her about how she was clean for good and then ...
It's just so lonely! All my friends have sisters and brothers and I don't, and I'm bored all the time. My parents work a lot, so I'm home alone at least three times a week, and although I've got friends and sports, I'm just really alone.
It's awkward going out to dinner or going on vacation because my parents just want to sit and relax, and I want to go out and do things, but it's embarrassing going everywhere with your parents. I miss having her around. -- ALONE IN OHIO
Must be nice to be able to have hobbies, friends and family and still be angst-ridden.
Life is not fair. It never will be. And the lonliness? Unless you learn to be comfortable with yourself you'll always be alone. People can't be with you 24 hours a day. If you metaphorically disappear when no one else is around, you have problems deeper than a sister that passed away.
I recommend solitary refinement: When others don't have time for you, go do things you enjoy by yourself and don't tell anyone what you have done. I mean, don't be stupid and do drugs or get drunk. Get to a stage where you can be happy without needing someone else around. Learn who you are without people.