Going to try a new format. I'll post the asking letter, then on the left I'll post Abby's response (which I've stopped reading half the time) and on the right I'll post my Dear Crabby response. Good idea? Bad idea? Let me know!
Abby links in the responses.
And now, onto the trash.
Exercise Floor Show Detracts From Visit With Relatives
DEAR ABBY: When my husband and I go to visit my mother (in another city) every other month or so, my brother and his wife insist on coming over to see us while we're there. Our visits usually last two or three days.
Many times when they come over, my sister-in-law will start doing her exercise routine, including floor exercises, which are, in my husband's and my opinion, unbecoming and inappropriate to do in front of other people.
How do we deal with this? Are we crazy to feel awkward when she's lying on her back doing these pelvic thrusts? Would it be out of line to ask her NOT to do this in the future?
My brother says, "She won't listen to me, so it wouldn't do any good to talk to her," so we know talking to her won't help. What do you suggest? -- FEELING AWKWARD
Abby links in the responses.
And now, onto the trash.
Exercise Floor Show Detracts From Visit With Relatives
DEAR ABBY: When my husband and I go to visit my mother (in another city) every other month or so, my brother and his wife insist on coming over to see us while we're there. Our visits usually last two or three days.
Many times when they come over, my sister-in-law will start doing her exercise routine, including floor exercises, which are, in my husband's and my opinion, unbecoming and inappropriate to do in front of other people.
How do we deal with this? Are we crazy to feel awkward when she's lying on her back doing these pelvic thrusts? Would it be out of line to ask her NOT to do this in the future?
My brother says, "She won't listen to me, so it wouldn't do any good to talk to her," so we know talking to her won't help. What do you suggest? -- FEELING AWKWARD
| From Abby DEAR FEELING AWKWARD: Here's how I'd handle it. Talk to her anyway, and ask her to please refrain from doing these exercises in your presence because it makes you uncomfortable. But if that doesn't work and she starts "performing," stand up and say, "Hey, folks. Let's go out for a walk (or coffee, or a sandwich)," and put an end to her bid for attention that way. | From Crabby Dear Awkward, Is it the fact that she's staying fit that bothers you? You could get off your own ass and join her. Do try communication. You're talking to the wrong person, though. Talk to her. Politely, because maybe you are being a fat, lazy jerk. Maybe you are sitting around the house all day and she would like some time to work out. You could go to her and say "When do you like to exercise? Okay, then we'll go take mom for lunch/coffee/sightseeing while you work out." I like to work out, too. Some of the exercises can be embarassing. Sounds like your sister-in-law has more confidence than I do. And if you don't like looking at her, we developed this amazing ability: our eyes can move in their sockets, our eyelids can cover our eyes completely, our heads can be turned by our amazing necks. The body is an amazing machine, and you can use that machine to look anywhere but at her. Nobody said you had to stare at her cootch while she worked out. Or, since this is all happening at your mom's place, why don't you go cry like a child to her about it. "Buuuuutttt mooooooooommm! It's groooooosssss!" |
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