How Many Jehova's Witnesses Does It Take To Make A Joke Funny?

DEAR ABBY: Can you settle a dispute for me? When you go up to a house with two doors -- a regular door and a screen door -- and there is no doorbell, is it proper to open the first door and knock on the second door or is it considered rude? -- KNOCK, KNOCK

DEAR CANOE,
People don't like religious pamphlets handed to them.  Just stuff them in the garbage and go for a nice walk.
*sigh*
Open the screen door, knock, and allow the screen door to close while you take a step back. 

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