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DEAR Jerkass: My 2-year-old daughter has recently become boob-obsessed. The first thing she does in the morning is point at my chest and say, "Boobs!" If she hugs me, she tries to grab them. Sometimes I catch her staring at my chest in fascination. I scold her when she grabs at them, but it's disturbing.
I never taught her the word "boob" and feel annoyed that she probably learned it from our sitter. When I spoke to the sitter about it, she laughed and said it's perfectly normal and that a lot of kids are boob-obsessed. But it doesn't seem normal to me, and I'm creeped out.
I have started wearing sweatshirts to keep covered up. My little girl has also started grabbing my butt and lifting up my shirt, and I'm nervous about how she's acting around the sitter and other women in the family. Is this behavior normal? -- CREEPED OUT IN VALENCIA, CALIF.
Know who's behavior is not normal? Yeah, it's you. You're so uncomfortable about yourself that you can't cope with normal child development.
How do you think they learn about that stuff? Or are you the parent that is going to refuse to teach them anything about sex and then wonder why they got an STI or pregnant?
Children, especially toddlers, have no social filter. They will call fat people fat and ugly people ugly. They will tell strangers how they took a shit on the toilet, or their pants. It's our job to teach them tact. It doesn't just "come with the package"
Go online and read a few parenting websites, instead of writing an advice column with your stupid pedantic, stuffed sweatshirt, frigid behavior before you stunt the natural progress of your child.
Judas' Advice Column
This is where I take a Dear Abby column, and add my own brand of advice. I started by calling it Dear Crabby, but that's taken and JERKASS seems more fun.